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About this Blog

Every so often, someone really special comes into each of our lives and for many folks visiting this blog, Richard is one of those ” someone’s”.  Known for his practical jokes, he has made our lives rich with his kindness and light with his sense of humour. Did I mention his abiding passion for what he calls “The Lord’s Sport”?

Bill Sr. and Jr and me on 1st Tee

Bill Sr. and Jr and me on 1st Tee Cypress Point- Feb 2009

Our hope with this blog is that it serves a couple of purposes.  First, we hope to use it to update family and friends as well as allow them a forum to encourage Richard in his fight against this illness.  He found encouraging e-mails so helpful as he recovered from his Whipple surgery that we are trying to replicate that here.  We also hope it gives our children a chance to hear stories that we may have forgotten to tell them about their Dad. Finally, we hope it can be a forum for good where each of us can “pay it  forward”.  We will include some helpful links for those battling cancer and maybe even some healthy eating tips and recipes (Note that the “Raw” category refers to this and not to pornography).

So, we look forward to hearing from all of you…..we’ve already picked some golf photos that have to be up here.


10 Comments leave one →
  1. Peter Fitzpatrick permalink
    June 1, 2009 9:25 pm

    Hey Rich, I still think back to those summers at Val Morin. Great memories and great friendships, it was a one of a kind place and time. I remember running out of balls in the qualifying round on the third hole. It didn’t matter, I was lying twelve and I hadn’t left the tee. Your laughter made the whole situation a lot easier to swallow and to this day, nothing phases me on the golf course (a good thing considering the way I play). It may sound a little cliched, but those were some of the best days of my life. Lots of laughter and most of it thanks to you. My thoughts are with you Rich and even though a few years have passed I still number you amongst my closest friends. Best of luck, I’m rooting like crazy for you.


  2. Scott Millard permalink
    January 17, 2010 5:02 pm

    Hi Richard,

    I have fond memories of our time at Cedar Springs and with the investment club. You were always a lot fun to play with but at the same time a fierce competitor.

    I still laugh about the story Drew Knight told me many years ago about a match he had with you late on Saturday afternoon. Of course Drew showed up on time, warmed up properly and was outfitted with all the proper clothing and equipment.

    You on the other hand, were busy getting your grass cut, rushed to the game in some gardening clothes and still wearing the beat up runners that you cut the grass in. Grass-stained, covered in sweat and dirt and arriving at the last minute, you promptly whipped his but if I recall correctly. I learned never to underestimate you on the court. Its that tenacity and fight that has served you well through this past year.

    My apology for not keeping personally in touch but like a lot of families, I’m the socially lazy husband. However I have always read the many great Christmas messages over the years and thoroughly enjoyed and an grateful that you stayed in touch with the Millards.

    Keep up the fight Richard. Thinking of you always,
    Scott Millard.

    • Richard Lafave permalink
      January 18, 2010 4:21 pm

      Hi Scott – thanks for your email below. Our best to you and Deb, and if you should see them, please pass on our regards to Drew and Allison. We too enjoyed the Xmas letters from you the Burlington crowd – overall, Jane and I have great memories of our 10 years in Burlington. Thankfully we all had squash at the club to keep us grounded. We laugh when we think about cookie buffet we held each Xmas when our children were so young, the investment and book clubs we set up for everyone to learn ( yet were really an excuse to have social outings right ?? )

      As far as the battle with cancer, it’s been a challenge made easier to battle when one has so many friends and family pulling for me. Whether it be emails, letters, phone calls, both Jane and I get so much strength from receiving them each week. We feel extremely blessed to have such a wide network of friends that we have maintained over the years – they are the most important gift for us.

      We will keep the web site as current as possible during 2010 as a means of sharing what’s going on in our lives. All the best for the upcoming year.
      Richard and Jane

  3. Peter Leger permalink
    January 23, 2010 4:38 pm

    Hey Kid…First..Happy New Year to you, Jane and the family.Was speaking with Dru and he brought me up to date on your challenges. You are an inspiration to your family and to me as to how you are fighting to the end. So many people would have given up a long time ago but not you Kid…not you. Words are difficult to describe what a great attitude you have and how you have handled yourself in these difficult times.
    I have to admit you floored me with your news when we saw each other at RMGC in July at the Centennial. However I saw in your eyes that you weren’t going to sit down and roll over.Just like the days and times we put you in nets(because nobody else had the guts to) and fired frozen tennis balls at the”Gumper” during our shinny games in Cartierville and TMR

    Although we hadn’t seen much of each other recently I and Joanne always enjoyed the visits to Chicago and Lausanne Switzerland.I remember the “Percy Legerette reservation in Lausanne.Looked at Scotaland golf trip photos…Dru looks like he’s ready for retirement and you were in the rough all the time…as usual!!!!! Seemed like you needed a real golfer in the group…Champ”74.Looked and sounded like a fabulous trip and time.Also remember our great trip to Wolf Run…can still hear the howls in the distance… Especially in back swing!!

    Hope you ride these tough times out without too much stress and pain. I’m thinking of you Rich and my prayers are with you.An old friend . Peter

    BTW…fabulous website and touching compilation of memories…

    • Jane permalink*
      January 27, 2010 4:35 pm

      Pete – this is Rich, not Jane. As a family, we were pretty lucky to have the time and energy in 2009 to build some memories for life, and then capture these memories on a website . For this I thank Jane’s sister Lisa for both the idea to do this, and to build the eventual site as well.

      Years ago I had the opportunity to visit Haiti on two separate parish missions.

      Amidst the abject poverty we were all witness to, I asked Father Calixte , who was the priest from Haiti that accompanied our group, how these people could get up and face the day with such smiles on their faces. He replied:
      ” They focus on their blessings, as few as they may be. And if one is truly grateful for what God has given us, you will find you cannot be sad or unhappy.” I never forgot that talk we had, and it is this focus on the gift of family and friends, of which we have been blessed with many, that makes fighting the cancer much easier to do for Jane, myself and our three children.

      Raise a glass for me at the Centennial this coming summer ; I will be there in spirit !! Rich

  4. sylvie permalink
    February 3, 2010 8:16 pm

    Procrastination never does any good (well maybe drying dishes…) So I have decided to do that no more!!! Back in november aunt Elaine and oncle Bill sent us some LED purple lights (never realized it was so hard to find such colors!). We wanted to hang them around the children`s window so they can fall asleep looking at them. We remembered we don`t have outlets outside (we have an old shack, OK!) and at minus something it wasn`t an interesting attempt to suddenly install some. My husband had nice intentions and said we could hang them by the night lights outside (they have an outlet on them) good, but not good enough, we couldn`t even see them from the street only the ducks on the river could get a glimpse of them. So I got fed up. I took them one afternoon and hung them inside, around the kitchen window….2 days before december, ugh! …..
    Anyhooo, what I wanted to say was that from now on, these lights will be up every november (for the entire month no less) for you oncle Richard and everyone else who suffers from this awful disease, until we find a cure.

    Lots of love from our family to yours
    Sylvie x0x0x0x

    • Richard Lafave permalink
      February 4, 2010 3:18 am

      Sylvie – thank you for the note and the gift of your purple lights commitment each November !!! We know of several people who are planning similar type activities in Aunt Jane and my honor, and as always, we are always so touched by the support we receive from family and friends. We just hope as a family that we can return the favor to others if and when the time should warrant.

      As my time draws nearer, rest assured I will treasure your act of goodwill in my thoughts. I wish I had had the chance to see you more frequently over the years, and stay up to date with your life. But our move to the U.S. and raising a family seemed to get in the way. Well – all the best to you and your family . We will continue to post developments to the family site as events occur.

      Love Oncle Rich

      • Sylvie permalink
        February 4, 2010 8:40 pm

        Hi oncle Rich,

        I couldn`t help but reply to your last comment. I`ve been crying since I read it because its so true. But I am sure living in the US has had its perks!
        Well i figured its not too late if you wnat to know more about my life and I`ve had a very blessed one :-). Even more since i married the most wonderful man and had my children, life has never been the same since. When my daugther was born I wanted to give her the best of everything. Doing some research for skincare and toys i stumbled on some articles and found out how much of what we live with, put on our skin, breathe or eat is so intoxicated with so many chemicals. Many of them causing cancer.
        I`ve been touched by cancer at a very young age via my young cousin….but now it`s also our neighbours and a dear friend of ours who`s 8 yr old son has a brain tumour. it`s got to stop…children should not have to start life in a hospital bed.
        We had decided I would stay home with the kids until they go to school (best perk is having mom home, right!)but its been very challenging with only one salary so last year I decided to start my own business (I know not the best way to bring in some dough!). I researched and developed an organic skincare line for children. They contain only natural ingredients, no parabens,sulfates etc. The products will be done in march and the website is almost up and running! So exciting!!!!
        I also decided to do something meaningful. 1% of all profits will be donated to cancer research and the Make a Wish foundation. I hope one day to build a foundation based on the principle of educating people but mostly moms-to-be on how to help their children grow healthy.
        Well there it is.
        YOU, oncle Richard, will be forever be in my thoughts.
        Mom and dad say HI.
        Love Sylvie

  5. Jennifer Gingras permalink
    February 18, 2010 2:15 am

    Hi Richard and Jane, Clare and I stayed with you on our”girls’ vacation” in August 1986. You graciously offered a bed and a warm welcome, so that we could visit Niagara on the Lake. I loved being in the middle of your then young family. I had just started seeing a doctor, named Richard, whom I eventually married. I knew he must be a keeper, because he drove to Burlington to pick me up for a (his) family picnic in Acton, and he agreed to come into your home for a once over from Jane. Every time I heard of pellet stoves/ fireplaces I thought of you, Richard. Then there was Clare and Paul’s wedding and your son stood up to serenade the newlyweds with a variation of the Barney’s song.. As a nurse I am aware of the challenges / prognosis your diagnosis presents. As a spiritual person, I also know that science, is tremendously helped with prayer, love, and support. As your niece mentioned, we all have other family members (mother), friends, neighbours (a friend of my son), who battle cancer. Each one has a different diagnosis, but all face similar challenges, hoping for a healthy future. I’ll continue reading your posts and keep you in my thoughts.

  6. bob and pat kelly permalink
    April 6, 2010 6:00 pm

    Hi Jane,
    I am not sure where to begin.Thank you very much for your call
    last night Jane.
    Iwent to mass this morning(tue).I prayed for rich and for you and meg,chris, and mike.The final separation is painful.
    In a way,the whole idea of richard going to the Father at Easter is significant.
    Richard has risen to eternal life.
    I have your 2009 christmas card in front of me .what a great memory for you.(I think I have been in denial about my buddy)
    You are an amazing person Jane.We are blessed you and richard
    come into our lives way back in London (ont) days.
    We look forward to seeing you soon.
    With love
    Bob and Pat kelly

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